Sad Song

I feel that I am right now living the illusion of a normal life. I am loving that illusion. I don't know how that is possible with port discomfort, upcoming chemo and mood swings, but it seems that it will go on being normal for a long time to come. Of course that's not true. But it's delicious right now... Even a certain little girl's terrible-two tantrums when her blanket doesn't rest on her feet just right.

George has been trying to figure out anger. He gets mad and stomps his foot or hits a wall. Yesterday he got mad just as he began piano practice. "Why don't you start with one of your own compositions?" He pounded the keys and looked up at me sheepishly. "Is that a new piece? A mad piece?" He played a few keys again and told me it was a sad song.  He began to make a song. I wrote down the notes as he played, which is our routine. Usually, he stops and checks my work and then continues, but tonight he was absorbed. He finished and looked up at me, "I can't remember it all." "I wrote it down," I said. It was the first song he wrote that he has not been able to remember after writing it. He used the notations I wrote down and replayed it. It was in the key of a minor. I asked him if there were any words. All of his songs have had words. "No."

It was empowering for him to turn his anger into something other than stomping or yelling. He felt better. I felt better. And it was a beautiful song.

As both Tom and I, separately, left Cole's room, he called out in a sweet voice with his feet over his head on the wall "Momma" ("Daddy"), I love you ever." "I love you, too." Boy do I ever. They whine. They yell. They fight. But they rock!

Comments

[Deanna Ross]

Wow. I'm inspired by this, Coley.